January 24, 2026
My intention in starting this blog was not to share it with people I know in real life – to keep it disconnected from my “real life people” even though it is my real life. I believed I could be more authentic by being anonymous.
Did you catch that? I believed I could be more AUTHENTIC by being anonymous. I’m going to go ahead and call bologna on myself. Anonymity is my way of hiding. I don’t know if I am ready to fully own this. Authenticity means I put it out there for anyone to see and read and know.
So, I am not going to keep this a top-secret hidden blog. I am not going to lie if asked about it. I am not going to ask people I know not to read it. At the same time, I don’t intend to go out of my way to make it known. I don’t intend to post about this on any personal forums. Read this blog as though it was written by a friend, a neighbor, a colleague, even a family member, because chances are there is someone in your life who could write many of the same truths.
I’m not going to lie, there is this kind of deep-down fear of being exposed. I don’t know why. I am not saying or doing anything wrong. But that is what we as a society have made it. Mental health is not taken seriously. There is something wrong with you as a person if you feel these things. Just count your blessings. Quit being so dramatic. Just think happy thoughts. And on and on and on . . .
I used to hate the comparison of taking medicine for mental health to say diabetes. I hated the comparison because it was countercultural and because I hated myself and that seemed to be merely an excuse for my inability to “just be normal”. Even though I am constantly learning more and more that proves that what I am going through is not my fault and is not something I can single handedly conquer, I still feel ashamed, like I have something to hide.
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